Helen Fisher, PhD

The Tyranny of Love: Love Addiction—an Anthropologist’s View

Fisher, HE (2014) The Tyranny of love: Love addiction—­­an anthropologist’s
view. In Laura Curtiss Feder and Ken Rosenberg, Eds. Behavioral
addictions: criteria, evidence and treatment
. Elsevier Press

THE TYRANNY OF LOVE:
Love addiction—­­an anthropologist’s view

“When we want to read of the deeds of love,
whither do we turn? To the murder column.”

George Bernard Shaw

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Laymen and scientists have long regarded romantic love as part of the supernatural, or as an invention of the Troubadours in 12th century France, or as the result of cultural tradition. However, current data collected using brain scanning (functional magnetic resonance imaging or fMRI) indicate that feelings of intense romantic love engage regions of the brain’s “reward system,” specifically dopamine pathways associated with energy, focus, motivation, ecstasy and craving, including primary regions associated with addiction (Bartels and Zeki 2000; Fisher et al 2003; Bartels and Zeki 2004; Aron et al 2005; Fisher et al 2005; Ortigue et al 2007; Fisher et al 2010a; Acevedo et al., 2011, Xu et al 2011). Moreover, men and women who are passionately in love show all of the basic symptoms of addiction, including craving, tolerance, emotional and physical dependence, withdrawal and relapse (see Fisher 2004).

Because romantic love is regularly associated with a suite of traits linked with all addictions, several psychologists have come to believe that romantic love can potentially become an addiction (Peele 1975; Halpern 1982; Tennov 1979; Hunter et al 1981; Mellody et al 1992; Griffin­Shelley 1991; Schaef 1989). However, many define addiction as a pathological, problematic disorder (Reynaud et al 2010); and because romantic love is a positive experience under many circumstances (i.e. not harmful), researchers remain largely unwilling to officially categorize romantic love as an addiction.

But even when romantic love can’t be regarded as harmful, it is associated with intense craving and anxiety and can impel the lover to believe, say and do dangerous and inappropriate things. Moreover, all forms of substance abuse, including alcohol, opioids, cocaine, amphetamines, cannabis, and tobacco activate reward pathways (Volkow et al., 2007; Diana 2013; Koob and Volkow 2010; Melis et al., 2005; Frascella et al., 2010; Breiter et al 1997), and several of these same reward pathways are also found to be activated among men and women who are happily in love, as well as those rejected in love (Bartels and Zeki 2000; Fisher et al 2003; Bartels and Zeki 2004; Aron et al 2005; Fisher et al 2005; Ortigue et al 2007; Fisher et al 2010; Acevedo et al., 2011, Xu et al 2011). So regardless of its official diagnostic classification, I believe romantic love should be treated as an addiction (Fisher 2004): a positive addiction when one’s love is reciprocated, non­toxic and appropriate (i.e. neither partner is married to someone else or has other inappropriate lifestyle issues); and a negative addiction when one’s feelings of romantic love are inappropriate, toxic, not reciprocated and/or formally rejected (Fisher 2004).

This chapter maintains that romantic love is a natural addiction (Brown, in Frascella et al., 2010) that evolved from mammalian antecedents at the basal radiation of the hominid clade some 4.4 million years ago in conjunction with the evolution of serial social monogamy and clandestine adultery­­hallmarks of the human reproductive strategy (Fisher 1998; Fisher 2004; Fisher 2011). Its purpose was to motivate our forebears to focus their mating time and energy on a single partner at a time, thus initiating the formation of a pair­bond to rear their young together as a team (Fisher 1992; Fisher 1998; Fisher et al., 2006, Fisher 2011). The chapter discusses the traits associated with both positive and negative love addiction; it traces the evolution of love addictions to their likely origins; it proposes a theory for the biopsychological foundations of different types of love addiction; and it offers some scientifically­based suggestions for treatment of individuals suffering from rejection addiction.

ROMANTIC LOVE AS A POSITIVE ADDICTION

Human romantic love, also known as passionate love, obsessive love, and “being in love,” is a cross­cultural phenomenon. In a survey of 166 societies, Jankowiak and Fischer (1992) found evidence of romantic love in 147 of them. No negative evidence was found; in the 19 remaining cultures, anthropologists had failed to ask the appropriate questions. Jankowiak and Fischer concluded that romantic love constitutes a human universal, or near universal phenomenon (Jankowiak and Fischer 1992).
Romantic attraction is associated with a suite of psychological, behavioral and physiological traits (Liebowitz 1983; Fisher 1998; Hatfield et al. 1988; Hatfield and Sprecher 1986; Harris 1995; Tennov 1979). This passion begins as the lover starts to regard the beloved as special and unique; the beloved takes on “special meaning.” The lover focuses his/her attention on the beloved (saliency), as well as aggrandizes the beloved’s better traits while overlooking or minimizing their flaws. The lover expresses increased energy (hypomania), as well as ecstasy when the love affair is going well, mood swings into despair (and anhedonia) when problems in the relationship arise, and often general anxiety about their role, how to please and how to achieve their goal: union with the beloved. Adversity and social barriers heighten romantic passion and craving (frustration attraction). The lover suffers when apart from the beloved (separation anxiety), as well as expressing one or more sympathetic nervous system reactions when with the beloved, including sweating, stammering, butterflies in the stomach, a pounding heart and/or difficulty eating or sleeping: the lover is emotionally and physically dependent. They also distort reality, change their priorities and daily habits to accommodate the beloved, experience personality changes (affect disturbance) and sometimes do inappropriate or dangerous things to remain in contact with or impress this special other.

Neural Correlates of Four Broad Temperament Dimensions: Testing Predictions for a Novel Construct of Personality

Lucy L. Brown, Bianca Acevedo, Helen E. Fisher

Four suites of behavioral traits have been associated with four broad neural systems: the 1) dopamine and related norepinephrine system; 2) serotonin; 3) testosterone; 4) and estrogen and oxytocin system. A 56-item questionnaire, the Fisher Temperament Inventory (FTI), was developed to define four temperament dimensions associated with these behavioral traits and neural systems. The questionnaire has been used to suggest romantic partner compatibility. The dimensions were named: Curious/Energetic; Cautious/Social Norm Compliant; Analytical/Tough-minded; and Prosocial/Empathetic. For the present study, the FTI was administered to participants in two functional magnetic resonance imaging studies that elicited feelings of love and attachment, near-universal human experiences. Scores for the Curious/Energetic dimension co-varied with activation in a region of the substantia nigra, consistent with the prediction that this dimension reflects activity in the dopamine system. Scores for the Cautious/Social Norm Compliant dimension correlated with activation in the ventrolateral prefrontal cortex in regions associated with social norm compliance, a trait linked with the serotonin system. Scores on the Analytical/Tough-minded scale co-varied with activity in regions of the occipital and parietal cortices associated with visual acuity and mathematical thinking, traits linked with testosterone. Also, testosterone contributes to brain architecture in these areas. Scores on the Prosocial/Empathetic scale correlated with activity in regions of the inferior frontal gyrus, anterior insula and fusiform gyrus. These are regions associated with mirror neurons or empathy, a trait linked with the estrogen/oxytocin system, and where estrogen contributes to brain architecture. These findings, replicated across two studies, suggest that the FTI measures influences of four broad neural systems, and that these temperament dimensions and neural systems could constitute foundational mechanisms in personality structure and play a role in romantic partnerships.

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Generalized Brain Arousal Mechanisms and Other Biological, Environmental, and Psychological Mechanisms that Contribute to Libido

Donald W. Pfaff and Helen E. Fisher

This theoretical essay proposes that underlying the concept of libido is a primitive set of brain mechanisms responsible for the generalized arousal of the central nervous system (CNS) and the activation of all behavioural responses. Having given the concept of ‘generalized CNS arousal’ an operational definition, we write an equation that describes how specific motivational needs are integrated with generalized arousal to produce an overall state of the CNS sufficient for potentiating behavioural responses. Factor analysis of behavioural data with mice suggest that among all CNS arousal-related influences, generalized
arousal contributes about a third of the variance. Many neuroanatomical, neurophysiological, and genomic mechanisms for arousal are reviewed here. Highlighted are large reticular formation neurons in the medulla whose axons bifurcating rostrally and caudally equip them to contribute, respectively, both to cerebral cortical arousal and to autonomic arousal. Their rapid responses would cause sudden changes in CNS state associated with, for example, states of panic or rapid sexual attraction. Consequences of the actions of generalized arousal networks include increased alertness and attention that serve all cognitive functions and all emotional expression. Specifically with respect to psychoanalytic concepts these networks provide the psychic energy necessary for the expression of libido.


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Neural Correlates of Marital Satisfaction and Well-Being: Reward, Empathy, and Affect

Bianca P. Acevedo, Arthur Aron, Helen E. Fisher, Lucy L. Brown

Numerous studies suggest that marital satisfaction is associated with psychological and physical health. Using fMRI, the present study explored the neural correlates of marital satisfaction to investigate the physiological markers potentially mediating these health effects. Seventeen middle-aged individuals (M=52.85 years) in happy, stable, longterm, heterosexual pair-bonds (Mean length of marriage = 21.4 years) were scanned while viewing facial images of their spouses, as well as facial images of a familiar acquaintance and a close friend (to control for familiarity and social bonding). Participants’ marital satisfaction scores (assessed with the Relationship Assessment Scale; Hendrick 1988) were correlated with brain activity in response to all of these facial images. Greater marital satisfaction (after controlling for Passionate Love Scale scores) was positively correlated with activation in several neural regions, including the ventral tegmental area (reflecting reward and motivation); the orbitofrontal cortex (associated with the evaluation of rewards); the anterior insula (associated with empathy); the inferior frontal gyrus (associated with the mirror system), the bed nucleus of the stria terminalis (associated with stress control); and the prefrontal cortex (associated with affective regulation). Greater marital satisfaction was also associated with decreased activation of the subcallosal cingulate gyrus, an area whose high activity is implicated in severe depression. These findings highlight key neural sites that may mediate the link between relationship quality with psychological and physical well-being and health.

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Serial Monogamy and Clandestine Adultery: Evolution and consequences of the dual human reproductive strategy

Fisher, H.E. (2011) Serial monogamy and clandestine adultery: Evolution and consequences of the dual human reproductive strategy. IN. S.C. Roberts (Ed.) Applied Evolutionary Psychology: New York, NY: Oxford University press.

Fisher, H.E. (2011) Serial monogamy and clandestine adultery: Evolution and consequences of the
dual human reproductive strategy. IN. S.C. Roberts (Ed.) Applied Evolutionary Psychology: New
York, NY: Oxford University press.
SERIAL MONOGAMY AND CLANDESTINE ADULTERY:
Evolution and consequences of the dual human reproductive strategy

Considerable data suggest that Homo sapiens has evolved a dual reproductive strategy: life long and/or serial monogamy in conjunction with clandestine adultery (Fisher 1992). This paper explores the underlying biochemical and genetic mechanisms likely to contribute to this flexible, yet specific human reproductive system and explores some of the implications of this dual human reproductive strategy for contemporary partnerships.

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Neurobiology of human attachment

Pair-­bonding is a hallmark of humanity. Data from the Demographic Yearbooks of the United Nations on 97 societies canvassed in the 1980s indicate that approximately 93.1% of women and 91.8% of men in that decade married by age forty­nine (Fisher 1989; Fisher, 1992). Worldwide marriage rates have declined somewhat since then; but today 85% to 90% of men and women in the United States are projected to marry (Cherlin 2009). Cross­culturally, most individuals wed one person at a time: monogamy. Polygyny is permitted in 84% of human societies; but in the vast majority of these cultures, only 5% to 10% of men actually have several wives simultaneously (Frayser, 1985; van den Berghe, 1979). Because polygyny in humans is regularly associated with rank and wealth, monogamy may have been even more prevalent in prehorticultural, unstratified societies (Daly and Wilson 1983). Human monogamy is not, however, always life long. Nearly half of all marriages in the US end in divorce. By age 35, 10% of American women have had three or more husbands (Cherlin 2009). Data collected from the Demographic Yearbooks of the United Nations on 58 societies from 1947 to 1989, as well as a host of ethnographic studies, indicate that divorce and remarriage are also common cross­culturally (Fisher 1992; Fisher 1989).
Several data suggest that this human disposition for pair­bonding has a biological basis. The contemporary psychological investigation of human attachment began with Bowlby (Bowlby 1969; 1973) and Ainsworth (Ainsworth et al 1978) who proposed that, to promote the survival of the young, primates have evolved an innate attachment system designed to motivate infants to seek comfort and safety from their primary caregiver, generally mother. Since then extensive psychological research has been done on the behaviors and feelings associated with this attachment system in adults (Fraley and Shaver 2000); and researchers have proposed that this biologically­based attachment system remains active throughout the life course, serving as a foundation for attachment between pair­bonded spouses for the purpose of raising offspring (Hazan and Diamond 2000; Hazan and Shaver 1987). Hatfield refers to the human feelings associated with these attachment behaviors as companionate love, which she defines as “a feeling of happy togetherness with someone whose life has become deeply entwined with yours.” (Hatfield et al. 1988:191).
The human penchant to form pair­bonds is rare among mammals; only 3% form pair­bonds to rear their young. But pair­bonding is common in avian species; some 90% of more than 8,000 avian species practice pair­bonding to rear their young. Moreover in all avian and mammalian species where monogamy is the primary reproductive strategy, it is associated with a particular suite of behaviors, including mutual territory defense and/or nest building, mutual feeding and grooming, maintenance of close proximity, affiliative behaviors and shared parental chores. The ethological literature commonly regards this constellation of pair­bonding behaviors as a behavioral syndrome that evolved primarily to motivate mating partners to sustain an affiliative connection long enough to complete species­specific parental duties.
The most informative biological research on pair­bonding in mammals has been collected on prairie voles (Microtus ochrogaster). These individuals mate soon after puberty and maintain a monogamous relationship throughout their life course, raising a series of litters as a team; and some of the neural underpinnings of their pair­bonding behaviors have been established. When prairie voles engage in sex, copulation triggers the activity of oxytocin (OT) in the nucleus accumbens among females and arginine vasopressin (AV) in the ventral pallidum among males, which then facilitates dopamine release in these reward regions and motivates females and males to prefer a particular mating partner, initiate pair­bonding and express attachment behaviors (Lim, Murphy & Young 2004; Carter, 1992; Lim and Young, 2004).
These data are corroborated in other species. Promiscuous white­footed mice and promiscuous rhesus monkeys do not form pair­bonds or express attachment behaviors for a specific mate, and the males of these species do not express the same distribution of V1a receptors in the ventral pallidum (Bester­Meredith et al., 1999; Wang et al., 1997; Young, 1999; Young et al., 1997). Moreover, when scientists (Pitkow et al 2001; Lim and Young 2004) transgenically inserted the genetic variant in the vasopressin system associated with pair­bonding in male prairie voles into the ventral pallidum of male meadow voles, an asocial promiscuous species, vasopressin receptors were up­regulated; these males also began to fixate on a particular female and mate exclusively with her, even when other females were available (Lim et al., 2004). When this gene was inserted into non­monogamous male mice, these creatures also began to exhibit attachment behaviors (Young et al., 1999).
A number of groups have reported that the basic human motivations and emotions arise from distinct systems of neural activity and that these brain systems derive from mammalian precursors (Davidson 1994; Panksepp 1998). So it is parsimonious to suggest that the underlying physiology associated with human monogamy is similar to that of other mammalian pair­bonding species. Moreover, activity in the ventral pallidum has been linked with longer­term pair­bonding in humans (Aron et al., 2005; Acevedo et al., 2008; Acevedo et al., in press; Fisher et al 2010). And although the AVPR1A gene among Homo sapiens is not homologous to the one found in prairie voles, humans do have similar alleles in this genetic region (Walum et al 2008), suggesting that a related biological system plays a role in human monogamy.

INFIDELITY
Monogamy is only part of the human reproductive strategy. Infidelity is also widespread (Buunk & Dijkstra, 2006; Fisher, 1992). The National Opinion Research Center in Chicago reports that some 25% of American men and 15% of American women philander at some point during marriage (Laumann et al 1994). Other studies of American married couples indicate that 20%­-40% of heterosexual married men and 20%-­25% of heterosexual married women have an extramarital affair during their lifetime (e.g., Greeley, 1994; Laumann et al., 1994; Tafoya & Spitzberg, 2007); still other researchers indicate that some 30% to 50% of American married men and women are adulterous (Gangestad and Thornhill 1997). When polled, approximately 2%­-4% of American men and women
had had extramarital sex in the past year (Forste & Tanfer, 1996).
The Oxford English Dictionary defines adultery as sexual intercourse by a married person with someone other than one’s spouse. But current researchers have broadened this definition to include sexual infidelity (sexual exchange with no romantic involvement), romantic infidelity (romantic exchanges with no sexual involvement) and sexual and romantic involvement (Glass & Wright, 1992). When considering these varieties of adultery, statistics vary. In a meta­analysis of 12 studies of infidelity among American married couples, Thompson (1983) reported that 31% of men and 16% of women had had a sexual affair that entailed no emotional involvement; 13% of men and 21% of women had been romantically but not sexually involved with someone other than their spouse; and
20% of men and women had engaged in an affair that included both a sexual and emotional connection.
Currently 70% of American dating couples report an incidence of infidelity in their partnership (Allen & Baucom, 2006). Furthermore, in a recent survey of single American men and women, 60% of men and 53% of women admitted to “mate poaching,” trying to woo an individual away from a committed relationship to another to begin a relationship with them instead (Schmitt & Buss, 2001). Mate poaching is also common in 53 other cultures (Schmitt et al, 2004).
Infidelity was also widespread in former decades. Reports in the 1920s indicated that 28% of American men and 24% of women were adulterous at some point after wedding (Lawrence, 1989). In the late 1940s and early 1950s, approximately 33% of men and 26% of women in an American sample were adulterous (Kinsey et al., 1948; Kinsey et al., 1953); in the 1970s, some 41% of men and 25% of women reported infidelity (Hunt, 1974); and data collected in the 1980s indicated that 72% of men and 54% of women were unfaithful at some point during their marriage. Infidelity was also common among the classical Greeks and Romans, among the pre­industrial Europeans, among the historical Japanese, Chinese and Hindus and among the traditional Inuit of the arctic, Kuikuru of the jungles of Brazil, Kofyar of Nigeria, Turu of Tanzania and many other tribal societies (Fisher, 1992). Extra­pair copulations also occur frequently in every other society for which data are available (Frayser 1985). Human testes size suggests that adultery by both sexes was also common in hominid prehistory (Short, 1977; Moller 1988)
Extra­pair copulations (EPCs) are prevalent in over 100 species of monogamous birds and several mammalian species examined (Mock & Fujioka 1990; Westneat, Sherman, & Morton, 1990; Wittenberger & Tilson, 1980). Only 10% of some 180 species of monogamous songbirds are sexually faithful to their mating partners; the rest engage in EPCs. Among swift foxes (Vulpes velox) over 59% of a female’s offspring were not genetically related to the male with whom she was pair­bonded (Kitchen et al 2006). Extra­pair copulations are also common among gibbons (Hylobates lar) (Reichard 1995).
In fact, infidelity is so widespread and persistent in monogamous avian and mammalian species, including humans, that scientists now refer to monogamous species as practicing “social monogamy,” in which partners display the array of social and reproductive behaviors associated with monogamy
while not necessarily displaying sexual fidelity as well.
Myriad psychological, sociological and economic variables play a role in the frequency and expression of infidelity (Tsapelas, Fisher and Aron, 2010). But recent genetic studies suggest that biology plays a role. Walum et al (2008) investigated 552 couples biologically, psychologically and socially. All were either married or co­habiting for at least five years. Men carrying the 334 allele in a specific region of the vasopressin system scored significantly lower on a questionnaire, the Partner Bonding Scale, indicating less feelings of attachment to their spouses. Moreover, their scores were dose dependent: those carrying two of these alleles showed the lowest scores for feeling of attachment, followed by those carrying only one allele, followed by those carrying no copies of this allele. Men carrying the 334 allele also experienced more marital crises (including threat of divorce) during the past year. These results were also dose­dependent; men with two copies of the allele were approximately twice as likely to have had a marital crisis as those who had inherited either one copy or no copies. Men with one or two copies were also significantly more likely to be involved in a partnership without being married. Last, the spouses of men with one or two copies of this allele in the vasopressin system scored significantly lower on questionnaires measuring marital satisfaction.
This study did not measure infidelity directly; instead it measured several factors likely to contribute to infidelity. Nevertheless, among prairie voles, polymorphisms in a similar gene in the vasopressin system contribute to the variability in the strength of the monogamous pair­bond (Hammock & Young 2002), including the degree to which individuals express sexual fidelity (Ophir, Wolff, & Phelps, 2008). Moreover, in a more direct recent study of infidelity in a sample of 181 young adult humans, Garcia and colleagues (Garcia et al 2010) found a direct link between specific alleles in the dopamine system (DRD47R+) and a greater frequency of uncommitted sexual intercourse (one night stands) and a higher frequency of sexual infidelity.
Another biological system may contribute to infidelity. In the now classic “sweaty t­shirt” experiment, women sniffed the t­shirts of several anonymous men and selected the t­shirts of those they felt were the sexiest. They selected the shirts of men with different genes (from themselves) in a
specific part of the immune system, the major histocompatibility complex (MHC) (Wedekind et al., 1995). In a subsequent investigation, women married to men with similar genes in this part of the immune system were also more adulterous; and the more of these genes a woman shared with her spouse the more extra­dyadic partners she engaged sexually (Garver­Apgar et al., 2006).
Brain architecture may also contribute to infidelity, due to the connections between three distinct yet interrelated brain systems that evolved for mating, reproduction and parenting: the sex drive; romantic attraction; and attachment (Fisher 1998). In mammals, the sex drive is associated primarily with the estrogens and androgens; however in humans only the androgens, particularly testosterone, are central to sexual desire in both men and women (Sherwin 1994; Van Goozen et al 1997). Studies (fMRI) indicate that specific networks of brain activation are associated with the sex drive, among the regions involved is the hypothalamus (Arnow et al., 2002; Karama et al 2002) and amygdala (Karama et al 2002). Romantic attraction (also known as romantic love, obsessive love, passionate love or being in love) is primarily associated with elevated dopamine activity in reward pathways of the brain (Fisher et al 2005; Aron et al 2005; Bartels and Zeki 2000; Bartels and Zeki 2004; Acevedo et al 2008; Acevedo et al., in press; Fisher et al 2010). As discussed above, attachment in humans and other mammals is associated primarily with oxytocin and vasopressin activity in the nucleus accumbens and ventral pallidum respectively (Lim, Murphy & Young 2004; Lim and Young 2004; Acevedo et al., in press; Fisher et al 2010).
These three basic interrelated but distinct neural systems interact with one another and many other brain systems in myriad flexible, combinatorial patterns to provide the range of cognitions, emotions, motivations and behaviors necessary to orchestrate our complex human reproductive strategy (Fisher et al 2002). Nevertheless, these three brain systems are not always directly connected, making is possible for one to express deep feelings of attachment for one individual, while one feels intense romantic attraction toward another, while one feels the sex drive for more extra­dyadic partners (Fisher, 2004). The relative biological independence of these three neural systems for mating and reproduction enable Homo sapiens to engage opportunistically in social monogamy and clandestine adultery simultaneously (Fisher 2004).

EVOLUTION OF MONOGAMY
Monogamy could have evolved at any point in hominid evolution. However two lines of possible evidence suggest that the neural circuitry for human pair­bonding evolved with the basal radiation of the hominid stock (Fisher 1992), most likely in tandem with the hominid adaptation to the woodland/savannah eco­niche some time prior to 4 million years BP. Ardipithecus ramidus, currently dated at 4.4 my BP, displays traits associated with reduced sexual dimorphism; so Lovejoy (2009) suggests that human monogamy had evolved by this time. Anthropologists have also re­measured Australopithicus afarensis fossils for skeletal size; and they report that by 3.5 million years BP hominids exhibited roughly the same degree of sexual dimorphism in several traits as the sexes exhibit today, thus they have proposed that these hominids were “principally monogamous” (Reno et al 2003:1073).
The emergence of facultative bipedalism may have been a primary contributing factor to the evolution of the neural circuitry for hominid monogamy (Fisher 1992). While foraging and scavenging in the woodland/savannah eco­niche, bipedal Ardipithecine females were most likely obliged to carry infants in their arms instead of on their backs, as quadrupedal female apes do, thus needing the protection and provisioning of a mate while they transported nursing young. Meanwhile, Ardipithecine males may have had considerable difficulty protecting and providing for a harem of females in this open woodland/savannah eco­niche. But a male could defend and provision a single female with her infant as they walked near one another, within the vicinity of the larger community.
So the exigencies of facultative bipedalism in conjunction with hominid expansion into the woodland/savannah eco­niche may have pushed Ardipithecines over the “monogamy threshold,” selecting for the brain chemistry and brain architecture for pair­bonding and associated attachment behaviors (Fisher 1992; 2004).
EVOLUTION OF SERIAL MONOGAMY
Contemporary cross­cultural patterns of divorce suggest that serial social monogamy may have also evolved as part of the suite of traits associated with hominid adaptation to the expanding woodland/savannah eco­niche prior to 4 my BP. Data on 58 human societies taken from the Demographic Yearbooks of the United Nations between 1947 and 1989 indicate three worldwide divorce patterns. Divorce occurs most frequently among couples with one dependent child; among couples at the height of their reproductive and parenting years (ages 25­29); and among couples married a modal duration of four years (Fisher 1989; Fisher 1992). Because four years is the common duration of birth spacing in hunting/gathering societies, and because many monogamous avian and mammalian species form pair­bonds that last only long enough to rear the young through infancy, this human cross­cultural modal divorce peak may represent the remains of an ancestral hominid reproductive strategy to remain pair­bonded at least long enough to raise a single child through infancy, about four years (Fisher 1992).
Children in hunting/gathering societies characteristically join a multi­age playgroup soon after being weaned, becoming the responsibility of older siblings and other relatives in the band. So in the EEA, the ecological pressure on couples to remain pair­bonded after offspring weaning would have been substantially reduced, unless the couple conceived another child. Moreover, ancestral hominids that practiced serial social monogamy in association with offspring weaning would have created disproportionately more genetic variety in their lineages, an adaptive phenomenon (Fisher 1992).
EVOLUTION OF CLANDESTINE ADULTERY
Infidelity often involves considerable time and metabolic energy. It also involves risk; adultery can lead to diseases, unwanted pregnancy, and many adverse social consequences, including losing one’s home, spouse, children, job, community and/or health. Yet, despite near universal disapproval of infidelity, this worldwide phenomenon occurs with regularity. Most curious, regardless of the many correlations between relationship dissatisfaction and adultery (see Tsapelas, Fisher and Aron 2010), Glass and Wright (1985) report that among Americans who engage in infidelity, 56% of men and 34% of women rate their marriage as “happy” or “very happy.” Because philandering is prevalent worldwide; because it is associated with a wide range of psychological and sociological factors; because it is correlated with several biological underpinnings discussed above; because promiscuity is the primary reproductive strategy among our closest primate relatives, bonobos and common chimps; and because infidelity occurs even in “happy” and “very happy” marriages today; it is likely that infidelity is a core aspect of our primary human reproductive strategy, and that it evolved in tandem with hominid serial social monogamy for adaptive purposes.
Many scientists have offered hypotheses regarding the selective value of infidelity (see Buss 1994). Among these, it has been proposed that in the ancestral woodland/savannah eco­niche, philandering males and females would have disproportionately reproduced, as well as reaped the reproductive benefits of genetically more varied offspring (Fisher 1992). Unfaithful females may have also garnered economic resources from extra­dyadic liaisons, as well as parenting support if their primary partner died or deserted them (Fisher 1992). Hence clandestine infidelity (in conjunction with serial and/or life long social monogamy) may have had reproductive payoffs for both males and females throughout the EEA, selecting for the biological underpinnings of infidelity in both sexes today.
Along with the evolution of serial/lifelong social monogamy and clandestine adultery, several other neural systems may have evolved. Three are considered next: the brain system associated with feelings of intense romantic attraction to a specific individual; four proposed temperament dimensions that may have begun to play a guiding role in mate choice; and the brain networks associated with rejection in love. All of these neural systems most likely served other purposes among our hominoid forebears prior to the hominid radiation into the woodland/savannah eco­niche. Nevertheless, these neural systems may have taken on new functions with the evolution of the hominid dual reproductive strategy.
EVOLUTION OF ROMANTIC ATTRACTION
Human romantic love (also known as passionate love, obsessive love, and “being in love”) is a cross­cultural phenomenon (Jankowiak and Fischer 1992). In a survey of 166 societies, Jankowiak and Fischer (1992) found evidence of romantic love in 147 of them. No negative evidence was found; in the 19 remaining cultures, anthropologists had failed to ask the appropriate questions, cases of ethnographic oversight. Jankowiak and Fischer concluded that romantic love constitutes a “human universal… or near universal”(Jankowiak and Fischer 1992).
Romantic attraction is associated with a specific suite of psychological, behavioral and physiological traits (Fisher 1998; Gonzaga et al. 2001; Hatfield et al. 1988; Hatfield and Sprecher 1986; Harris 1995; Tennov 1979). Romantic love generally begins as an individual starts to regard another individual as special, unique. The lover focuses his/her attention on the beloved, aggrandizing the beloved’s worthy traits and overlooking or minimizing their flaws. The lover expresses increased energy, ecstasy when the love affair is going well, and mood swings into despair during times of adversity. Adversity and social barriers tend to heighten romantic passion, “frustration attraction” (Fisher 2004). The lover often suffers “separation anxiety” when apart from the beloved,
and a host of sympathetic nervous system reactions when with the beloved, including sweating, stammering, butterflies in the stomach and/or a pounding heart. Lovers are emotionally dependent; they change their priorities and daily habits to remain in contact with and/or to impress the beloved. Smitten humans also exhibit increased empathy for the beloved; many are willingness to sacrifice, even die for this “special” other. The lover also expresses sexual desire for the beloved, as well as intense sexual possessiveness, “mate guarding.” Yet the lover’s craving for emotional union with the beloved tends to supersede his/her craving for sexual union with him or her. Most characteristic, the lover thinks obsessively about the beloved, “intrusive thinking.” Romantic attraction is also involuntary and difficult to control.
Several neuroimaging studies of romantic love indicate the physiological underpinnings of this near­universal human experience (Fisher et al 2003; Aron et al 2005; Bartels and Zeki 2000; Bartels and Zeki 2004; Ortigue et al 2007; Acevedo et al 2008; Fisher et al 2010). Human romantic love is predominantly associated with increased activity in several regions of the reward system, mediated most likely by increased dopamine release (Fisher et al 2005; Aron et al, 2005; Acevedo et al., in press; Fisher et al 2010). But activity in the ventral tegmental area (VTA), a central region of the brain’s reward system associated with pleasure, general arousal, focused attention and motivation to pursue and acquire rewards (Schultz 2000; Delgado et al 2000; Elliot et al 2003) is central to the experience.
Considerable data suggest that the human brain system for romantic attraction arose from mammalian antecedents. Like humans, all birds and mammals exhibit mate preferences; they focus their courtship energy on favored conspecifics (Fisher 2004). This phenomenon is so common that the ethological literature regularly uses several terms to describe it, including “female choice,” “mate preference,” “individual preference,” “favoritism,” “sexual choice” “female choice,” “selective proceptivity” (Andersson 1994) and “courtship attraction” (Fisher 2004). Furthermore, most of the basic traits associated with human romantic love are also characteristic of mammalian courtship attraction, including increased energy, focused attention, obsessive following, affiliative gestures, possessive mate guarding, goal­oriented behaviors and motivation to win a preferred mating partner (Fisher et al 2002; Fisher 2004).
The biological underpinnings of human romantic attraction and mammalian courtship attraction are also similar. When a female laboratory–maintained prairie vole (Microtus ochrogaster) is mated with a male, she forms a distinct preference for him associated with a 50% increase of dopamine in the nucleus accumbens (Gingrich et al 2000), a central region of the reward system. When a dopamine antagonist is injected into the nucleus accumbens, the female no longer prefers this partner; and when a female is injected with a dopamine agonist, she begins to prefer the conspecific who is present at the time of the infusion, even if she has not mated with this male (Gingrich et al., 2000; Wang et al., 1999). An increase in central dopamine is also associated with courtship attraction in female sheep (Fabre­Nys et al 1998). In male rats, too, increased striatal dopamine release has been shown in response to the presence of a receptive female rat (Montague et al. 2004; Robinson et al. 2002). In most species courtship attraction is brief, however, lasting only minutes, hours, days or weeks; while in humans, intense, early­stage romantic love can last 12 to 18 months (Marazziti et al. 1999) or much longer (Acevedo et al., in press).
Because human romantic attraction shares many behavioral and biological characteristics with mammalian courtship attraction, it is likely that human romantic love is a developed form of this mammalian courtship biobehavioral mechanism (Fisher 1998; Fisher 2004). The hominid variation of this neural system may have began to develop prior to 4 my PB, as facultative bipedality became necessary for the carrying of tools, weapons, food and infants in the woodland/savannah eco­niche, selecting for individuals who formed monogamous partnerships to rear their young through infancy. The sex drive served to motivate individuals to seek copulation with a range of partners; romantic attraction evolved to motivate individuals to focus their mating energy on a single partner; and the neural system for attachment evolved to motivate Ardipithecine individuals to sustain this partnership at least through the infancy of a single offspring (Fisher 1998; Fisher 2004).
EVOLUTION OF MATE CHOICE
The evolution of romantic love, serial social monogamy and clandestine adultery may have also stimulated new patterns of mate choice. Mate selection is governed by myriad cultural and biological factors. Men and women tend to be more attracted to individuals who have similar attitudes and values (Shaikh and Suresh 1994; Krueger and Caspi 1993); those from a similar socio­economic and ethnic background (Buston and Emlen 2003; Byrne, Clore and Smeaton 1986; Cappella and Palmer 1990; Rushton 1989; Laumann et al 1994; Pines 1999); those with a similar level of education and intelligence (Buston and Emlen 2003; Byrne, Clore and Smeaton 1986; Cappella and Palmer 1990; Laumann et al 1994; Pines 1999); and those who share their religious and political views and social
goals (Laumann et al 1994; Pines 1999). Men and women also gravitate to individuals with a similar degree of financial stability, sense of humor and social and communication skills (Buston and Emlen 2003; Byrne, Clore and Smeaton 1986; Cappella and Palmer 1990; Galton 1884; Laumann et al 1994; Pines 1999). Freud (1905) (and many others) have proposed that one’s parents play a primary role in one’s romantic choices; and Harris (1999) proposes that individuals choose a partner who reflects the values, interests, ideals and goals of the friends they knew during their formative years. Timing also plays a role (Hatfield 1988), as does proximity (Pines 1999). And the MHC component of the immune system may play a role in mate choice (Wedekind et al 1995).
But temperament may play a role as well (Fisher 2009). Personality is composed of two basic types of traits: traits that an individual acquires, dimensions of character; and traits with biological underpinnings, dimensions of temperament (Cloninger 1994). Many traits of temperament are heritable, relatively stable across the life course and linked to specific gene pathways and/or hormone or neurotransmitter systems. Moreover, although many neural systems orchestrate human survival and reproduction, only four brain systems are regularly associated with human cognition, feelings, motivations and behaviors: the dopamine, serotonin, testosterone and estrogen/oxytocin systems (Fisher 2009; Fisher et al 2010a; 2010b; 2010c).
A literature review indicates that each of these four neural systems is associated with a distinct constellation of related biobehavioral traits (temperament dimensions or behavior syndromes). Variations in the dopamine system (DA) have been linked with exploratory behavior, thrill, experience and adventure seeking, boredom susceptibility, and disinhibition (Zuckerman, 2005; Cloninger et al., 1991; 1994); mania and hypersocial behavior (Depue & Collins, 1999); enthusiasm (Goreman & Wesman, 1974; Zuckerman, 1994); lack of introspection (Cloninger et al., 1991; Ebstein et al., 1996; Gerbing, Ahadi & Patton, 1987); energy, motivation and achievement striving (e.g., Depue & Collins, 1999; Wacker et al., 2006); exploration (Espejo, 1997); abstract intellectual exploration (DeYoung et al., 2002); cognitive flexibility (Ashby et al., 1999); plasticity (DeYoung et al., 2005); curiosity (e.g., Olson, Camp & Fuller, 1984); and idea generation and verbal and non­linguistic creativity (Flaherty, 2005).
The suite of biologically based traits associated with the serotonin system (5­HT) include sociability (Golimbet et al., 2004), lower levels of anxiety, higher scores on a scale of hypomania and extroversion, and lower scores on a scale of “No Close Friends” (Golimbet et al 2004), as well as with positive mood (Flory et al., 2004; Opbroek et al., 2002), religiosity (Borg et al, 2003), conformity (DeYoung et al.,2002), orderliness (DeYoung & Gray, 2005), conscientiousness (Manuck et al., 1998), concrete thinking (Zuckerman 1994), self­control (Manuck et al., 2000), sustained attention (Zuckerman 1994), low novelty seeking (Serretti et al., 2006) and figural and numeric creativity (Reuter et al., 2006)
The biobehavioral traits currently linked with prenatal testosterone (T) expression are heightened attention to detail, intensified focus, and restricted interests (e.g., Baron­Cohen et al., 2005; Knickmeyer et al., 2005). Testosterone activity is also associated with emotional containment (Dabbs & Dabbs, 1997), emotional flooding, particularly rage (Manning, 2002), social dominance and aggressiveness (e.g., Dabbs, 1990; Knickmeyer et al., 2005; Mazur et al., 1997), less social sensitivity (Baron­Cohen et al., 2005) and heightened spatial and mathematical acuity (See Nyborg 1994).
The constellation of biobehavioral traits associated with the estrogen (E) and related oxytocin (OT) systems include verbal fluency and other language skills (Baron­Cohen et al., 2005; Knickmeyer et al., 2005; Manning, 2002), empathy, nurturing, the drive to make social attachments, and other prosocial skills (Baron­Cohen, 2002; Kendrick, 2000, Pedersen et al., 1992; Taylor et al., 2000), contextual thinking (Baron­Cohen et al., 2005; Dabbs & Dabbs, 2000; Fisher, 1999), imagination (Fisher, 2009), and mental flexibility (Skuse et al., 1997).
To study the possible role of these four broad temperament dimensions in human mate choice, first a questionnaire was designed to measure the traits constellations associated with each of these brain systems. This measure consisted of 56 questions: 14 questions to measure an individual’s expression of each scale (i.e. the dopamine, serotonin, testosterone and estrogen/oxytocin scales). Data were collected and the questions modified on these four scales regularly between 2006­2007, using an Internet dating site, Chemistry.com, a division of Match.com, until reliability was obtained in a United States sample of 39,913 anonymous men and women. Participants completed demographic information, the questionnaire, and 12 validity questions with the goal of finding a romantic partner. Respondents ranged in age from 18 to 88 years (M = 37.0; SD= 12.6); 56.4% were female (N = 22,521); 89.6% (N = 35,759) were seeking an opposite­sex partner. All individuals expressed all four temperament dimensions; yet individuals varied in the degree to which they expressed each.
The final measure was named the Fisher, Rich, Island Neurochemical Questionnaire (FRI­NQ) (Fisher et al 2010a; 2010b; 2010c). The Cronbach’s alpha internal consistency coefficient in the final US sample of 39,913 was .79 for the proposed dopamine scale; .79 for the proposed serotonin scale; .80 for the proposed testosterone scale; and .78 for the proposed estrogen/oxytocin scale. The FRINQ measure was then placed on an international dating site (Match.com) in 39 other countries and data to measure reliability were collected on 15,000 individuals in five of these translations: German, French, Spanish, English (Australian sample), and Swedish. The alpha coefficients reflected acceptable levels (ranging from .71 to .82) across the four scales in these five other countries.
After this questionnaire had achieved adequate reliability and had correlated positively with 12 validity measures (Fisher 2009; Fisher et al 2010; Fisher et al 2010a; Fisher et al 2010b; Fisher et al 2010c; Fisher et al in preparation), it was employed to investigate the initial attraction phase of mate choice. A random sample of anonymous participants from the online dating website Chemistry.com® was examined. The sample consisted of 28,128 heterosexual adults (17,776 men; 10,352 women) who had just had an initial meeting with a potential partner and who had given a positive or blank rating of their partner after returning from this first date.
Men and women who predominantly expressed the constellation of biobehavioral traits associated with the proposed dopamine scale were significantly more likely to choose to meet individuals who predominantly expressed this same temperament dimension. Those who predominantly expressed the constellation of traits associated with the proposed serotonin scale were also significantly more likely to select to meet individuals biochemically similar to themselves. But individuals who predominantly expressed traits associated with the proposed testosterone scale were significantly more likely to choose to meet their opposite, those who predominantly expressed traits associated with the proposed estrogen/oxytocin dimension, and vice versa (Fisher 2009; Fisher et al 2010c)
It has been hypothesized that variations in human personality stem from their reproductive advantages in the shifting ecological and social environment of prehistory (Buss 1991; MacDonald 1995). Although these four temperament dimensions may have evolved among mammals long before the hominid radiation into the woodland/savannah eco­niche, their roles in human mate choice may have emerged by positive selection as our hominid forebears became obliged to form longer­term attachments prior to 4 my BP (Fisher 2009). Unions between individuals predominantly expressing testosterone and those predominantly expressing estrogen and oxytocin may have increased their fecundity by pooling suites of complementary temperament traits; while mates who were both expressive of the proposed serotonin system may have capitalized on some very effective parenting traits, including loyalty, calm and caution; while mates who were both expressive of the proposed dopamine system (and equally novelty­seeking, curious and creative) may have engaged in more extra­pair copulations and serial partnerships, thereby producing disproportionate genetic variety in their lineages.
So it is proposed that the human predisposition to seek partners with specific biochemical profiles evolved in conjunction with the evolution of monogamy to facilitate more effective mate choices in the expanding woodland/savannah environment of southern and eastern Africa prior to 4 my PB (Fisher 2009).
EVOLUTION OF ROMANTIC REJECTION
The evolution of serial/long­term social monogamy coupled with clandestine adultery most likely elevated the trauma of rejection in love. To study the neural systems associated with romantic rejection, ten female and five male college­age heterosexuals were studied, using functional Magnetic Resonance Imaging (fMRI); all had recently been rejected by their partners but reported that they were still intensely in love (Fisher et al 2010). The average length of time since the initial rejection and the participants’ enrollment in the study was 63 days. All scored high on the Passionate Love Scale (Hatfield and Sprecher 1986), a self­report questionnaire that measures the intensity of romantic feelings. All participants said that they spent more than 85% of their waking hours thinking of the person who rejected them and yearned for their abandoning partner to return to the relationship.
Brain activations coupled with romantic rejection included activity in the ventral tegmental area (VTA) associated with feelings of intense romantic love, the nucleus accumbens and orbitofrontal/prefrontal cortex associated with craving and addiction, the insular cortex and the anterior cingulated associated with physical pain and the distress associated with physical pain, and the ventral pallidum associated with feelings of attachment (Fisher et al 2010). Thus, rejected individuals are experiencing extreme feelings of romantic passion, intense craving, and severe physical and mental distress.
Rejected individuals also often experience “abandonment rage”(Meloy 2001). The primary rage system is closely connected to centers in the prefrontal cortex that anticipate rewards (Panksepp 1998); and animal studies indicate that these reward networks and rage circuits are intertwined (Panksepp 1998), producing a response to unfulfilled expectations known as “frustration­aggression.” Abandonment rage stresses the heart, raises blood pressure and suppresses the immune system (Dozier 2002). Romantic rejection can also stimulate feelings of resignation, despair, lethargy, despondency and depression (Najib et al 2004; Panksepp 1998); some broken­hearted lovers die from heart attacks or strokes caused by their depression (Rosenthal 2000).
Few men or women cross­culturally avoid the suffering of rejection at some point over the life course. In one American college community, 93% of both sexes queried reported that they had been spurned by someone they passionately loved; 95% reported they had rejected someone who was deeply in love with them (Baumeister et al 1993). Moreover, rejected individuals most likely suffer for evolutionary reasons. They have wasted precious courtship time and metabolic energy; and their social alliances and reproductive future have been jeopardized. So rejected individuals are most likely fighting a strong survival system that evolved to provide them with the energy and motivation to renew or sustain a foundering partnership crucial to reproduction in the EEA (Fisher 2004).
CONCLUSION
Critics of evolutionary psychology fail to find the profound value of this budding discipline. For example, people have long regarded romantic love as part of the supernatural, or as an invention of the Troubadours in 12th century France, or as the result of childhood training and cultural experiences. On the contrary, romantic love engages primary regions of the brain’s primitive “reward system” associated with focus, energy, craving and intense motivation to win and/or sustain a partnership; it most likely emerged from mammalian antecedents during hominid evolution to enable our forebears to focus their mating energy on a single mate and initiate a pair­bond essential to their reproductive and genetic survival. If the medical and legal communities were to understanding that romantic love is an evolved drive (Fisher 2004) that can lead to severe social and personal consequences, they might develop new procedures for dealing with the negative aspects of this powerful neural mechanism.
Indeed, it would be appropriate to treat romantic rejection as a biologically­based addictive state. Because romantic love is associated with focused attention, euphoria, craving, obsession, compulsion, distortion of reality, personality changes, emotional and physical dependence, inappropriate and dangerous behaviors, tolerance, withdrawal symptoms, relapse, and loss of self­control, several psychologists have regarded romantic love as an addiction (Peele 1975; Carnes 1983; Halpern 1982; Tennov 1979; Hunter et al 1981; Mellody et al 1992; Griffin­Shelley 1991; Schaef 1989). Data from neural imaging confirm this; romantic rejection activates three basic brain regions associated with craving and addiction (Fisher et al 2010).
Researchers and therapists might also design their therapies differently if they were to acknowledge the varying ways that the sexes process rejection (Baumeister et al 1993; Buss 1994; Hatfield and Rapson 1996). Men are two to three times more likely to commit suicide after being rejected (Hatfield and Rapson 1996); and men are more likely to stalk a rejecting partner, as well as batter or kill her (Meloy et al 2001). Rejected women report more severe feelings of depression (Mearns 1991) and more chronic strain and rumination after being rejected (Nolen­Hoeksema et al 1999). Women are also more likely to talk about their trauma, sometimes inadvertently retraumatizing themselves (Hatfield and Rapson 1996). Equally important to know is that feelings of romantic love after rejection recede with time. Neural imaging (fMRI) indicates that the greater the number of days since rejection, the less activity there is in the brain region associated with attachment, the right ventral putamen/pallidum (Fisher et al 2010). Also, areas associated with reappraising difficult emotional situations and assessing one’s gains and losses are activated after rejection, suggesting that rejected individuals are trying to understand and learn from their difficult situation.
Knowledge of evolutionary psychology could also help professionals (and many others) understand the underlying (evolutionary) predispositions that lead to unstable partnerships. The brain mechanisms associated with serial monogamy and clandestine adultery surely contribute to many contemporary cross­cultural patterns of philandering and divorce, as well as the high cross­cultural incidence of sexual jealousy, partner stalking, spousal abuse, love homicide, love suicide and clinical depression (Meloy and Fisher 2005).
Last, I feel it is essential that the medical and legal communities begin to embrace the possible consequences of contemporary antidepressant usage (Fisher and Thomson 2007). Over 100 million prescriptions for antidepressants are written annually in the United States; most are for SSRIs, Selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitors that elevate serotonin at the synapse. It is well known that these drugs cause sexual dysfunction in as many as 73% of patients. But these drugs may also adversely affect the neural system for romantic love, blunting this powerful brain mechanism for mate choice (Fisher 1999; Fisher and Thomson 2007) . These drugs may also jeopardize several other specific neural systems that evolved to enable people to assess potential mates, prefer and choose specific partners, feel extended romantic passion, and and/or sustain feelings of attachment during a long­term relationship (Fisher 1999; Fisher and Thomson 2007). The number of neural mechanisms associated with mate selection, romantic love and long­term partnership stability are unknown, and
many operate outside of conscious awareness. If professionals prescribing these medications for long term use were aware of their potential effects on conscious and unconscious neural systems associated human reproduction, they might consider informing patients of their potential side effects, as well as
undertake far more expansive studies of these drugs, particularly their effects on the neural systems for romantic love and attachment (Fisher and Thomson 2007).
Anthropologists, psychologists, sociologists, economists, primatologists, zoologists, and many other scholars have painstakingly accumulated a wealth of data on aspects of human behavior and its counterparts in many other species, using the perspective of evolutionary psychology. These data can add valuable understanding into many issues affecting human marital and sexual relationships.

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The Natural Leadership Talents of Women

From Enlightened Power: How Women Are Transforming the Practice of Leadership. L Coughlin, E Wingard and K Hollihan (Eds). San Francisco, CA: Jossey Bass.

“If ever the world sees a time when women shall come together purely and simply for the benefit and good of mankind, it will be a power such as the world has never known.”1 Nineteenth-century poet Matthew Arnold believed that women can change the world. He was prophetic. At this critical time in history, many are seeking alternatives to the traditional command-and-control models of leadership. This chapter describes some of the biological underpinnings of women’s natural leadership talents. Myriad diverse factors contribute to leadership performance in both women and men, including an individual’s personality traits, thinking and feeling styles, values, motivations, childhood experiences, and cultural milieu. Nevertheless, a great deal of scientific evidence has now demonstrated that in some respects the sexes are, on average, not alike.

THE NATURAL LEADERSHIP TALENTS OF WOMEN

Helen E. Fisher

“If ever the world sees a time when women shall come together purely and simply for the benefit and good of mankind, it will be a power such as the world has never known.”1 Nineteenth-century poet Matthew Arnold believed that women can change the world. He was prophetic. At this critical time in history, many are seeking alternatives to the traditional command-and-control models of leadership. This chapter describes some of the biological underpinnings of women’s natural leadership talents. Myriad diverse factors con- tribute to leadership performance in both women and men, including an individual’s personality traits, thinking and feeling styles, values, motivations, childhood experiences, and cultural milieu. Nevertheless, a great deal of scientific evidence has now demonstrated that in some respects the sexes are, on average, not alike.

No wonder. For millions of years, men and women did different jobs, tasks that required different skills. As natural selection weeded out less able workers, time carved differences in the male and female brain. No two human beings are alike. Countless cultural forces influence how men and women think and act. And each one of us is an elaborate mix of both male and female traits. Yet, on average, each sex has its own range of abilities; each is a living archive of its distinctive past.

In my research, I have identified some talents that women ex- press more regularly than men; aptitudes that stem, in part, from women’s brain architecture and hormones, skills that leadership theorists now espouse as essential to leadership effectiveness.2 These talents are not exclusive to women, of course, yet women display them more regularly than men.

Web Thinking: Women’s Contextual View

One remarkable difference is (HF) the way that men and women tend to think. Psychologists report that when women cogitate, they gather details somewhat differently than men. Women integrate more details faster and arrange these bits of data into more complex patterns. As they make decisions, women tend to weigh more variables, consider more options, and see a wider array of possible solutions to a problem. Women tend to generalize, to synthesize, to take a broader, more holistic, more contextual perspective of any issue. (HF: please put the commas back in. They tend to think in webs of factors, not straight lines, so I coined a term for this broad, contextual, feminine way of reasoning: web thinking.

Men are more likely to focus their attention on one thing at a time. They tend to compartmentalize relevant material, discard what they regard as extraneous data, and analyze information in a more lin- ear, causal path. I call this male pattern of cogitation step thinking.

We are beginning to know how these capacities for web think- ing and step thinking are created. The female brain has more nerve cables connecting the two brain hemispheres; the male brain is more compartmentalized, so sections operate more independently. Moreover, testosterone tends to focus one’s attention. Women’s lower levels of this hormone may contribute to their broader, more contextual view. Scientists even know the locations of some of the brain regions for these thinking processes. And some of the genes that construct these regions vary between the sexes. One gene, for example, is active in 50 percent of women and silenced in all men.

Women’s proclivity for web thinking probably evolved millions of years ago when ancestral females needed to do many things at once to rear their young, whereas men’s step thinking probably emerged as ancestral hunters focused on the pursuit of game. Both web thinking and step thinking are still valuable, but in the contemporary business community, buzzwords include “depth of vision,” “breadth of vision,” and “systems thinking.” In this highly complex marketplace, a contextual view is a distinct asset. Women are built to employ this perspective. In fact, in one study of Fortune 500 companies, senior executives were asked to describe women’s most out- standing business contribution. Their consensus: women’s more varied, less conventional point of view.

Women’s web thinking provides them with other natural leadership qualities. According to social scientists and business analysts, women are better able to tolerate ambiguity—a trait that most likely stems from their ability to hold several things simultaneously in mind. And if I had to sum up the modern business environment in one word, I would call it… ambiguous. Women are well endowed for this indefinite business climate.

Women’s web thinking also enables them to exercise more intuition—and intuition plays a productive, if often unrecognized, role in managerial decision making. This mental capacity has been explained by psychologist Herbert Simon. He maintains that as people learn how to analyze the stock market, run a business, or follow a political issue, they begin to recognize the patterns involved and mentally organize these data into blocks of knowledge, a process Simon calls chunking. With time, more and more related patterns are chunked, and clusters of knowledge are stored in long-term memory. Then when a single detail of a complex situation appears, the experienced person can instantly recognize the larger design and predict outcomes that another must deduce with plodding sequential thought. Sherlock Holmes remarked of this, “From long habit, the train of thought ran so swiftly through my mind that I arrived at the conclusion without being consciously aware of the intermediate steps.”3 Women, on average, excel at this form of thought.

Also related to web thinking is long-term planning—the ability to assess multiple, complex scenarios and plot a long-term course. To my knowledge, no scholar has studied gender differences in long-term planning. However, some business analysts believe that women are apt to think long term more regularly, whereas men are more likely to focus on the here and now. Women definitely use long-term strategies more regularly in their financial affairs. In fact, in a study of six thousand investors, three-quarters of the women had no short-term investment goals; the trading records of thirty-five thousand clients of a large brokerage firm showed that men traded 45 percent more often than women.

There is, most likely, a biological component to women’s long- term approach. From studying patients with brain injuries, neuroscientists now know where in the brain long-term planning takes place. Women and men display some differences in the structure of these brain regions. So it is possible that women’s brain architecture contributes to their tendency to plan long term. Women may have evolved the propensity to think long term to plan for their children’s distant future. Today, however, this faculty predisposes women to see business issues from a longer perspective—an essential element of leadership.

Mental Flexibility

Women’s brain architecture for web thinking has endowed them with another natural talent—mental flexibility. Mental flexibility is an essential trait of leadership in our dynamic global economy.

In a recent study of nine hundred managers at top U.S. corporations, researchers reported that “women’s effectiveness as man- agers, leaders and teammates outstrips the abilities of their male counterparts in 28 out of 31 managerial skill areas.”4 Among these skills was “generating new ideas.” I suspect that the ability to generate new ideas is the product of women’s mental flexibility, as well as yet another aspect of women’s web thinking: imagination. What is imagination but the capacity to reach into the depths of one’s stored knowledge, assemble chunks of data in new ways, examine these myriad combinations, and “suppose” how various arrangements might play out? All are aspects of web thinking—women’s forte. John F. Kennedy once said, “We need men who can dream of things that never were.”5 We need the female mind as well.

Verbal Articulation: Words Are Women’s Tools

Women have other skills that enable them to lead. An exceptional female talent is the ability to find the right word rapidly—basic articulation. As Mark Twain said, “The difference between the right word and the almost right word is the difference between lightening and the lightning bug.”6

Women’s verbal skills begin to emerge in early childhood. Infant girls babble more than infant boys. They speak sooner, with longer utterances and more complex grammatical constructions. By age twelve, girls excel at grammar and spelling and at understanding and remembering what they read. Moreover, American women share this verbal fluency with women in Japan, Nepal, England, and every other country where these skills have been tested—most likely because women’s verbal aptitudes are associated with gender differences in the brain, as well as the female hormone, estrogen. In fact, a woman’s facility with words increases during the middle of the monthly menstrual cycle when estrogen levels peak.

Women are born to talk—a feminine acuity that probably evolved to enable ancestral women to comfort, cajole, and educate their little ones, chastise, even ostracize group members who failed to meet their responsibilities, reward those who did and maintain harmony in the community. Words were women’s tools. Words still sway minds and hearts. And as contemporary women leaders have opportunities to express their “voices” in the workplace, their power will increase.

Executive Social Skills

Women have what scientists call “executive social skills.” From millennia of rearing prelinguistic babies, women have evolved a keener ability to pick up the nuances of posture and gesture, read complex emotions in faces, and hear slight changes in tone of voice. Women, on average, have a better sense of taste, touch, smell, and hearing. They see better in the dark, have better peripheral vision, and remember more objects in the room or landscape. As novelist Sarah Orne Jewett remarked, “Tact is, after all, a kind of mind reading.”7 With these skills, women are built to read minds. In fact, several of these “people skills” are associated with the female hormone, estrogen. So it’s not surprising that women already hold over 60 percent of jobs in the booming service sector of the world economy—another way they lead.

Networking, Collaboration, and Empathy

Along with women’s executive social skills are their remarkable facilities for networking, collaboration, empathy, inclusion, and sharing power. Men tend to cast themselves within hierarchies and view power as rank and status; women, on the other hand, form cliques and regard power as an egalitarian network of supportive connections. These traits have also been linked with hormones. When birds and mammals are injected with the predominantly male hormone, testosterone, they begin to fight for rank; infusions of estrogen tend to produce nurturing and connecting behaviors instead. These feminine dispositions to work in egalitarian teams, network, and support others were unquestionably vital to ancestral women who needed to support one another and their children. Today these traits are still more impressive contributions to the con- temporary business environment.

The Coming Collaborative Society

Web thinking, mental flexibility, the ability to embrace ambiguity, intuition, imagination, a penchant for long-term planning, verbal acuity, executive social skills, the capacity to collaborate, and empathy are all essential leadership traits in the new global economy. But this is not to suggest that women will run the world. Many men display these traits to a considerable degree. Moreover, men have a host of other skills that make them natural leaders as well. Men are, on average, superior at all sorts of spacial and engineering skills, gifts associated with testosterone. Using these capabilities, men have long been building our “high-tech” society, vastly improving human health and welfare.

Men and women are like two feet—they need each other to get ahead. Nevertheless, the world is changing in ways that can profit from women’s skills as well as those of men. Today, the business services and health care industries, the media, the law, not-for-profit organizations, and service professions are all burgeoning. All can benefit from women’s natural talents.

Indeed, the business world has begun to feel the impact of women’s leadership skills. As educated women become influential in offices of all kinds around the world, they are spreading their taste for cooperation, flexibility, and egalitarian team playing, as well as providing a broader perspective and new ideas. On television, women have supplied more sensitive depictions of women, more ethnic and age diversity, more visual and performance arts, more programming for children, and a broader, more contextual perspective on many issues. Women’s faculty for language and appetite for complexity are also enriching what we read in newspapers, magazines, and books.

With their “people skills” and imagination, women have begun to provide all sorts of professional services that bring comfort and novelty to our work and leisure hours. Women bring compassion, patience, team playing, and a broader perspective to hands-on healing. They offer creativity in the classroom. And because women tend to have different views on child abuse, sexual harassment, abortion, and criminality in general, women in the law are enlarging our view of justice.

With their influential role in not-for-profit organizations, women are improving the welfare of women, children, minorities, the elderly, and the disabled and disadvantaged, as well as the environment. They are gradually making a difference in government. And with their votes, women are more prominently placing the issues of education, health, child care, poverty, and the environment on the national and international agenda.

Women are also changing family life. Marriage is undergoing a reformation. The traditional patriarchal family headed by the male is metamorphosing into new family forms. Most important, more couples are forming what sociologists call “companionate marriages” or “peer marriages,” marriages between economic and social equals.

Peer marriages are not new. Throughout deep history, women commuted to work to gather fruits and vegetables, contributing 60 to 80 percent of the evening meal. In hunting-gathering societies, the double-income family was the rule. Men and women were economic, social, and sexual equals. When our forebears settled down to farm, women lost much of their economic and social power. But today we are returning to our original ancestral lifestyle. The twenty-first century may be the first in the modern era to see the sexes live as their forebears lived a million years ago: as equals. We are inching toward a collaborative society, a global culture in which the merits of both men and women are becoming understood, valued, and employed.

Albert Einstein once said, “The significant problems we face today cannot be solved by the same level of thinking that created them.”8 Women bring a different way of thinking; a cooperative spirit; a gift for “reading” people; patience; empathy; networking abilities; negotiating skills; a drive to nurture children, kin, business connections and the local and world community; an interest in ethnic diversity and education; a keen imagination; a win-win attitude; mental flexibility; an ability to embrace ambiguity; and the predisposition to examine complex social, environmental, and political issues with a broad, contextual, long-term view. As the female mind becomes unleashed on our modern world, societies will benefit—even in lands where it is currently shackled.

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Neural Correlates of Long-Term Intense Romantic Love

Bianca P. Acevedo, Arthur Aron, Helen E. Fisher, and Lucy L. Brown
Social Cognitive and Affective Neuroscience Advance Access published January 5, 2011

The present study examined the neural correlates of long-term intense romantic love using functional magnetic resonance imaging (fMRI). Ten women and 7 men married an average of 21.4 years underwent fMRI while viewing facial images of their partner. Control images included a highly familiar acquaintance; a close, long-term friend; and a low-familiar person. Effects specific to the intensely loved, long-term partner were found in: (i) areas of the dopamine-rich reward and basal ganglia system, such as the ventral tegmental area (VTA) and dorsal striatum, consistent with results from early-stage romantic love studies; and (ii) several regions implicated in maternal attachment, such as the globus pallidus (GP), substantia nigra, Raphe nucleus, thalamus, insular cortex, anterior cingulate and posterior cingulate. Correlations of neural activity in regions of interest with widely used questionnaires showed: (i) VTA and caudate responses correlated with romantic love scores and inclusion of other in the self; (ii) GP responses correlated with friendship-based love scores; (iii) hypothalamus and posterior hippocampus responses correlated with sexual frequency; and (iv) caudate, septum/fornix, posterior cingulate and posterior hippocampus responses correlated with obsession. Overall, results suggest that for some individuals the reward-value associated with a long-term partner may be sustained, similar to new love, but also involves brain systems implicated in attachment and pair-bonding.

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Infidelity: When, Where, Why.

Tsapelas, I, HE Fisher, and A Aron (2010) “Infidelity: when, where, why.” in WR Cupach and BH Spitzberg, The Dark Side of Close Relationships II, New York: Routledge, pp 175-196

Pair-bonding is a hallmark of humanity. Data from the Demographic Yearbooks of the United Nations on 97 societies canvassed in the 1990s indicate that approximately 93.1% of women and 91.8% of men married by age forty-nine (Fisher, 1992). Worldwide marriage rates have declined somewhat since then; but today 85% to 90% of men and women in the United States are projected to marry (Cherlin, 2009). Cross-culturally, most who marry wed one person at a time: monogamy. Polygyny is permitted in 84% of human societies; but in the vast majority of these cultures, only 5% to 10% of men actually have several wives simultaneously (Frayser, 1985; Murdock &White, 1969; van den Berghe, 1979). Monogamy, wedding one mate at a time, is the norm for Homo sapiens.

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Four Primary Temperament Dimensions in the Process of Mate Choice

Fisher, HE, J Rich, HD Island, D Marchalik, L Silver and D Zava (2010)
Poster in Division 06, # ind100727 at the annual meeting of the American Psychological Association San Diego, August 14, 2010

The purpose of this investigation was to examine the role of temperament in the initial attraction phase of mate choice. Cross-cultural surveys, brain imaging studies, population and molecular genetics, comparative research and twin studies suggest that many traits of temperament are heritable, relatively stable across the life course and linked to specific gene pathways and/or hormone or neurotransmitter systems. A literature review of behavior genetics, and studies of neurotransmitters, hormones, medications, illicit drugs, and gender reassignment indicate that a suite of biobehavioral traits are associated with four broad, interrelated yet different neural systems: 1) the related dopamine and norepinephrine systems; 2) the serotonin system; 3) the testosterone system; 4) and the related estrogen and oxytocin systems. Currently biological data are not sufficient to establish the exact biological bases of these four hypothesized dimensions of temperament. Nevertheless, the currently available literature, the reliability of the FRI-NQ measure, and the ten validity measures suggest that four temperament dimensions are likely to be associated with four interrelated yet specific neurochemical systems.

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